My dear friend, I appreciate the fact that u asked such a question despite being so called "successful"... it's not easy to accept ones misery after being successful in the worldly ways...))).
What u have asked has 3 different and diverse parameters... hard work, success, happiness
Let me share my experience and understanding about these 3 words.
Hardworking...
Have u ever observed as to what is the easiest thing to do in life.
And u will be surprised to know it's "hardworking" specially when things r going ur way.
Just look around, almost everybody is working hard...even those who are sitting are working hard in their minds, even the people who have retired are working hard even without working...they r just so restless sitting in their chairs...
Hard working is almost like a drug....one just doesn't know how to live without it in these times.
If u promise to pay ur worker for sitting idle, u will be surprised to know that after 2 days he will go crazy...he would start asking for something to do.
Why is it so, bcos hardworking is the easiest option, the most difficult option is right working, relaxed working.
Since u r already successful, try relaxing for a day...no talks, no phones, no tv, just total let go....u won't be able to bear it even for 30 minutes...just being with urself, no interference from anybody ...so difficult to relax and be with urself.
So first of all get this very clear that hardworking is not a virtue by any means ,
it's only for those workaholics who have no idea as to how to be relaxed, how to just enjoy this moment...how to be...ppl only know "how to do", they have no idea about "how to be".
You see we are "human beings and not human doings"....but we have lost the idea of being.
Hardworking has never helped anybody in living a beautiful life, it can only help u in acheiving targets, in hoarding the resources of life quickly.
Hardworking is just an obsession with ideas/ goals...and life as such has no goals,
This is leela to be enjoyed, a game to be played , not some kind of war that needs to be won by all means.
Hardworking shall take u to extremes and then burnouts and frustrations.
If u succeed still u wont be happy...if u fail...the result shall remain the same.
Hardworking is like arguing, even if u win the arguement u won't feel good, if the argument is lost, still the bittterness stays.
Hardworking is one extreme and laziness or lethargy is another extreme and extremes are never good.
Have u ever wondered that if u were alone in this world or with limited number of people in this world, would u be working hard, would u be trying to chase goals and hoard resources.
No, u won't.
Or if somebody tells u that u are goin to die after 2 days, will u still work hard or would u want to look at sun, at flowers, at children playing, enjoy eating ur food or enjoying ur cup of tea...feeling the fresh air...n so on...
Just the basic chores u wld want to live which u r so indifferent to right now, isn't it.
Just ask urself this simple question and chances are ur whole understanding will go topsy turvy.
Then why u do it.
First reason is peer pressure / social pressure.
Second and the most important "u don't know any other way of living ...
u don't know what to do with ur life...ur energy...ur time...
u never learn't any other way to live...nobody ever told u n u never saw it "
There is a saying "zindagi doo baras kee, samaan soo baraas ka......life is for a few years and we accumulate for centuries".
Hardworking can get u to accumulate the material wealth for 100 years but it will washout the real life that u have in hand.
That's why old age is so dreaded ...u work hard all ur life to acheive and accumulate but suddenly u realize and find that u cannot do anything with watever u have accumulated.
Life just slipped away...and for what...3 houses, 5 cars, 7 factories or more...bla bla bla.
Hardworking is not a virtue existentially, so don't be proud of it.....
just see what it has done to u and u may understand what i m trying to point at.
"Insomnia " is one of the end results of hardworking.
And hardworking is basically nothing but escapism from this moment.
Hardworking is nothing but an ideology of inflated ego.
Hardworking is nothing but an extension of the lust to power, to dominate, to control, to feel special, to feel different.
And hardworking is basically born out of fear of death which u want to conquer...it's foolishness.
U asked why u r unhappy "hard working is precisely one of the reasons......)))...."
Successful...
what is being successful.
To me the capacity to say "i quit" is the measure of success...
if u r so free that u can drop anything if it interferes with ur joy and peace is being successful....
To me success means " the capacity to live and to have lived totally with watever life presents/presented with....be it work, sports, studies relationships, food , sleep, morning walks....watsoever."
To me success means "to live a life in a manner that u always feel fulfilled for no reason...to be free from greed and fears...to live without hope...to be so complete that if next moment u have to die...there is not a bit of turbulence...no regrets"
Your definition of success is set by ur parents or ur relatives or ur society or people around u.
For me, definition of success is " to be free from the agenda set by others...other than myself for my life..."
U asked why u r unhappy...
bcos ur success is not ur success, it's something fed to u by others and chasing that u have not been able to fulfill ur destiny....
to live the way existence sent u to live...
ur success is just a wrong notion, making money is not the definition of success......
making money is one the easiest thing to do in life.....
You just need to understand the law of "demand and supply"...
Locate the demand and simply supply and u become a rich person...simple.
That's what happens in a stock market.
People hoard shares of a company...they create a demand...and then it goes high and then they supply at the high point, they become rich, very rich.
Same with commodities from cocoa to oil to metals to agri products to real estate...but is it success....may be for u...it's simple manipulation or understanding of human greed along the lines of demand and supply and playing it well...its just so easy...what's great about this kind of success.
Politicians become rich...contractors become rich.
Pay bribes...take contracts and make money...but is it richness.
Just think, what such actions has made of our lives.
Where r we heading....
Puncturing holes into mother earth from everywhere just to encroach upon everything.
For what...and we don't even realize that earth is more than 75% water...the 25% can easily disappear into that 75% percent, and then once the humanity is drowned all success stories will disappear with it.....))))....
My friend, start questioning ur wisdom...ur understanding of things.
Slow down...in doing so u will become aware.
Just watch every thought of urs, where is it taking u.
Just see how u r doing same thing again n again and keep falling in the same misery.
And then, stop doing what u have been doing.
Let ur happiness, peace n joy be ur guides, ur motivating factors rather than the social compulsions, hard work and success.
Learn to live every moment...learn to be present while drinking a glass of water, or eating food or watering trees or cleaning ur car or talking to ur subordinate.
Let every action be so full of awareness that it brings total fullfillment in this moment.
And this is called "meditation".
The art of coming to this moment...the art of staying in this moment.
Life is never in "then n there...it's in now and here".
Stop running, this road of success can only lead to craziness and nothing else...just a matter of time.
All the best.
Prem kamal
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